Things to try:

Homemade Samoa Cookies but use this version of the caramel & coconut topping because I want to try the homemade one.

YUM!!

Also, from Rachel, try making these jello oranges with the kids.

And don’t forget to read the Charlotte Mason and take notes.

And remember to use Amy’s tip on MY closet. GO DO THE CLOSET!!

Oh, and time to make more bread.

(Making myself accountable by going public with my goals. Because making cookies is apparently my goal… but really this is because I had all these browser windows open and it was starting to annoy me but I knew I needed to remember all these sites and my bookmarks folder is too stuffed so I ignore it. We’ll see if the blog works as a good reminder. It’s searchable, that’s a start!!)

And by done, I mean, “not done.”

We just got a funny phone call. Our investment fund sent us some stuff to vote for the board or shareholder something or another or I don’t know. Something for a vote, they do that every year and we pretty much ignore it (I know, bad of us) and we go on our merry little way. Well we just got a phone call from them saying we hadn’t voted and they needed to know our vote. It was a recorded line, they had to speak to both Kit & me (we have three accounts, two individual and one joint) and they said they would be sending us confirmation of our vote and blah, blah.

We hung up and burst out laughing because we were called on being slackers. This is our money, we should be paying more attention, right? We set up these investments the first year we were married, invested a lot while in California (making a lot) and when we came back to Texas and were unemployed we pulled back, but kept investing. We’ve pretty much not paid attention to them since. I think the last time we met with our investor guy was right after Bennett was born, Kit went down and met with him alone (which they didn’t really want, but I wasn’t going to pack boy on oxygen up for that meeting) and the guy looked at our budget and savings and investments and blah, blah. Then we got pregnant again, then we had four kids, then we got busy, then we got pregnant again. Our investments are on auto payment so we really do just ignore them… not responsible, I know.

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Benentt got TWO birthday desserts - well, three actually. Chocolate cupcakes & pink frosted cookies with his therapists, cake with some friends (it’s her birthday next week so we celebrated for both of them) AND a peanut butter chocolate chip cookie cake last night.

Kit had to physically restrain him when we lit the candles, he was screaming with glee:

Someday we WILL get a picture with all four (five) of them looking and not making faces. And maybe wearing clothes:

Again, trying to lick the candles:

I’ll take THIS piece:

Bennett’s birthday dinner was delicious - spaghetti with homemade sauce, salad (he ate the croutons, carrots & sunflower seeds), french bread with olive oil, fresh cracked pepper & balsamic vinegar (only Emy liked that of the kids) and stuffed mushrooms for the grown ups (though Emy snitched mine.) Bennett ate three helpings of spaghetti. Then cookie cake!

We decided even if Bennett didn’t care what he had for dinner, WE really felt entitled to a wonderful celebration dinner… of celebration of how far we’ve come and how we’ve grown over the last three years: Bennett, our family, our marriage, all of us as individuals.

Yesterday was quiet. We read books, we cuddled, we played outside. We danced and ate and bought a soccer ball that the kids are now all fighting over. (Bennett can scream “Soccer BAAAALLLLLLL!!” quite clearly.) And we bought a lot of fruit and not so many veggies. By 7:15pm Bennett had passed out from playing so hard, by 7:30pm Mommy had followed.

It was a really, really good day. It is exactly what I hoped and dreamt and prayed and pleaded for three years ago when Bennett was born… that he would live. That in three years he would be climbing the counter begging for more cake, and singing “Happy Birthday” to himself over and over, and carrying around his little box of books saying, “Read me dis one, Mommy?” That I would hear him tickling his baby sister and making her squeal, that Christopher would be teaching him to kick a soccer ball, that Bennett and Mo would be putting puzzles together and helping each other. THIS is exactly what I was dreaming of… I cannot imagine anything more wonderful.

Happy Birthday, Bennett. We love you.

That’s how Bennett’s been screaming “Happy Birthday” to himself for the last 24 hours.

More to come today, of course, but I ran across this last night and thought it was an interesting old blog post.

Bennett right after his “birth” day:

Bennett’s first birthday:

Bennett’s second birthday:

Bennett’s third birthday:

Third birthday post to come! Birthday boy is still asleep…

He’s awake now, he immediately asked for cake and snatched his books back up. New picture at the top of the post, compliments of Kit.

We’re not sure how to feel - we just had our final meeting with our therapists from ECI (early childhood) and they’ve been with us for literally the last four years!! Christopher began therapy in early 2004 and Moira started before he ended, then Bennett began. As we joked with them, Emy seems to not need them (W sitting aside!) so unless Mojo has a need for some extra help, we will never again see them professionally. And after four years of seeing them at times weekly, that feels like we’re saying good-bye to family!!

They brought Bennett a very fun present (a wooden puzzle that has numbers on one side of each piece and a picture of that number of objects on the other) and PINK frosted cookies (Mo’s in heaven) and we had mini-chocolate muffins for them. They said since Benentt has already learned all the letters, they thought they could help with the numbers. It’s perfect for him. They had a similar party for Mo when she transitioned from ECI to the school for therapy. Next Monday Bennett will begin walk in speech.

So we’re sad to see them go, but excited that Bennett has come so far with their help. Well, Bennett AND Christopher (can you believe he was in speech??) and Moira. They have been an invaluable asset to our family and we’ll miss them - even as we’re thankful to no longer need them.

Here is Mo saying good-bye when she turned 3, May 2006:

And here are the kids today:

Bennett was upset because he was trying to “work” and we interrupted him for the picture. These are his ABC sheets he had everywhere:

Notice that excellent and very mature pencil grasp he has?? He got points for that at his OT assessment and it’s one of the reasons he didn’t qualify. He looks so old in this shot, like some wise professor pouring over piles of research, don’t you think?

Update: We let Bennett open his present from Grandpa Gerald and Nana. Want to see his head EXPLODE WITH JOY?? Watch him open a box of BABY EINSTEIN BOOKS!! With bonus ABC poster we’ll be hanging up in his room tomorrow. Seriously, he tried to carry these books outside, to bed, to the bathroom. As soon as he was asleep Emy dived in for her turn. They are simple enough Christopher can read it to the kids which means pretty much all our kids adore them. Bennett’s current favorite movie of choice is Baby Einstein (oh, wait, did I mention that in my cranky post? And that was like two days ago, which means grandparents are seriously inspired!!) and these I can read to him without him whacking me! Woo-hoo!! Perfect, perfect gift.

I’m trying to get the page to load so I can confirm it with a link for you but I was just told President Gordon B. Hinckley passed away this evening.

The server is being overloaded right now but here is an article confirming…

Okay, here is the official article from the church.

President Hinckley is the first (only) prophet I’ve ever had the opportunity to see in person, when I was able to hear him speak in the Tabernacle at conference in October 1995 and then on campus at devotionals. He has been our prophet my entire adult life - he was set apart as the prophet the week I turned 18, March of 1995. I’m so sad to hear this news, but happy he’s now with his wife again. Marjorie Hinckley passed away in 2004.

With his death the First Presidency is dissolved and his two counselors, President Thomas S. Monson and President Henry B. Eyring, resume their positions in the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. After President Hinckley’s funeral the new prophet will be called and sustained but until then, the Twelve Apostles are the governing body of the church and have all the keys necessary to handle the affairs of the church.

Did I get those logistics right?

I’m happy for President Hinckley, but I’m so sad he’s gone… as I talked with Kit last night, I realized I was so young with the other prophets when I was a child that I believed that they were the prophet but I didn’t really understand or know what that meant. President Hinckley is the one that I knew, that I prayed about, that I questioned and confirmed a testimony of, he is the man that I knew was called as a prophet of God. I will miss hearing him speak, hearing his wisdom and guidance, feeling his spirit. I know we’ll love and respect and sustain the next prophet just as we’ve sought to sustain and follow the counsel of President Hinckley.

(Emily, thank you for letting us know the news so quickly!!)

Update: I would like to say, that thanks to Emily’s speedy news sharing, I had this posted BEFORE CNN. But at least they caught on quickly… I chuckled when I saw it read, “The church will choose a successor after the funeral.” Well, we’ll sustain one, but we aren’t going to be “choosing” one since that’s certainly out of our hands. I remember when President Hunter died and President Hinkley was sustained, it was an incredible thing to witness how the process so smoothly went as one prophet died and the leadership keys were passed to the Quorum, then on to the new prophet. I’m actually looking forward to being able to share that with the children and explain how it works, I hope the older two will be able to remember this experience as they see a new prophet being called and set apart.

Part of President Hinckley’s testimony shared at General Conference, April 2006.

President Hinckley with his counselors, President Monson and President Eyring.

Christopher, we just told you and Moira the news this morning. Moira yelled, “OH, NO!” when we said President Hinckley had died. Yesterday we wrote up a list for who we wanted to send Valentine’s to and we said to think of people that maybe need some extra special kindness that day (and you thought of Uncle Sean far away, among others.) Then both of you said, “PRESIDENT HINCKLEY!!” Maybe we’ll send a card to his family now…

You, Christopher, turned your back and started to cry when we told you. You told us, “I have a big lump feeling in my throat.” We asked about how you’re feeling and you said you’re happy President Hinckley is in heaven with his wife and Jesus, but you’re sad we don’t get to see him anymore. (I reminded you that you will see him again someday.) We showed you pictures of President Monson and assured you that you will LOVE him, but you said, “I’ll have him as president longer than President Hinckley??” and then got upset again… I’m so sorry, buddy. But you will love our new prophet, too.

I was watching a brief talk from the TED website (cool stuff) from a guy who runs a tinker’s camp for kids. Great idea — they break stuff down, rebuild it, build their own designs, blow stuff up. Great fun.

Anyway, his talk’s titled “5 Dangerous things to do with your child.” This links to the video’s original context, but I’ve embedded it in this post for the sake of convenience. If you want to skip right to the end, I’ve listed the five things below.

1. Play with fire
2. Use a knife
3. Throw a spear
4. Take apart appliances
5. Drive a car

That’s a good list, and one I agree with largely. We’re working on several of them with our kids, as a matter of fact. The one that really struck me, though, is the third there: Throw a spear.

Really, it doesn’t have to be a spear. It can be any thrown object, but objects with consequence are significant for this guy’s example. He asserts that “Humans are hardwired for throwing.” That’s not the first time I’ve ever heard that, though I’m finding a hard time finding supporting research. Despite that, I can still believe it.

We humans are fairly squishy critters. Certainly compared to our historical prey, which generally has something particularly sharp and dangerous with with they would attempt to disembowel us if we got too close. Our advantages are chiefly the ability to craft tools, determination, and bodies built for endurance. Take the hamstring, for instance. That one ligament demonstrates that we’re not well suited for flat out speed, but we can keep chasing something down long after that something, whatever it may be, has long tired out. Even better if we can poke it with something sharp before we have to start running too hard.

So, since the dawn of time, our kind has been conditioned to perform the calculus of throwing — binocular input, wind speed, relative height, distance, power, angle — all of it. Ask any comp sci major and they will tell you that crafting a rigid body simulation with a computer to accurately perform the computational analysis of a throw isn’t the easiest thing in the world to do, except that it is. Our bodies can do all of that in the blink of an eye, and what’s more, We’re really good at it. Throwing is one of the first things we can do. Give a baby something they don’t like and FLING! away it goes. Throwing is easy.

Catching is hard.

Just as we’re hardwired over the millennia to be great on the throwing end of the spear, it would follow that we would be equally hardwired to not be on the catching end of a spear. For a less deadly example, to catch a ball, not only do we have to perform those ridiculous levels of calculus on the fly, but we have to force our little primordial crocodile brains to stand in the face of certain death and not flinch when something has been flung at out bodies. Hardwired for throwing means hardwired for dodging.

So, when a kid has to stand there and catch a ball, it’s not an easy thing to do. Yet, it’s a common indicator used as a developmental milestone that so happens to require overcoming millennia of conditioning before one can establish a basic competency.

No deeper meaning here. Just that it’s hard to catch a ball.

Next blog post: we discovered a fun book for the kids. We’re thinking about buying it. I’ll tell you about it soon.

Ok. Here’s the movie.

SO, you may have noticed, we have a lot of children. Which means a lot of birthdays. That gets a bit challenging - not that I don’t love planning and throwing parties (I do!) but it can get expensive to host and it gets expensive for friends to attend if they feel they need to buy a gift for these parties. We’ve been pondering on this and chatting with friends about how they handle it and here are some of our ideas (and I would love to hear yours.)

We’re rotating years - one year it’s a family party, one year it’s a friends party. Family party years we let them pick a fun activity to do (movie date with Dad, trip to zoo, etc) and we still do cake & ice cream, etc. Friend party years they can invite everyone they want and I think maybe it will be less strain on guests to attend every other year? (Especially since our kids are often friends with siblings so that means they’re coming to our birthday parties 2 or 3 times a year!)

A few friends just did a party and asked instead of gifts that friends bring one book per child. Then each child went home with a book. I LOVE THAT IDEA!! The birthday kid gets the fun of a party with friends but there isn’t a huge focus on opening the presents and everyone gets something great to take home. And I’m always happy to have more books. We talked to the kids about that and I think this year we’ll be instating that policy (and we told them maybe their next friend party then presents will be okay. If they only get friend parties 2 out of 4 years and we rotate presents & book years, that’s a present every four years. That’s okay, right? Not too much strain on guests?)

Because I do think every few years it’s fun to throw them a BIG party with everyone they love and do all the party traditions and let them be the center of attention. Though I’m pretty sure we’re not going to bother doing big parties until the kid is at least 5 and has friends - under that age the party seems to be more for us than our birthday kid, they don’t care. We did a huge one for Christopher’s 1st but I think that was celebrating surviving the first year of parenthood. We didn’t do one for Emy, she didn’t mind. For their 8th birthday I know we’ll do a huge family thing (with the extended family) since that’s the year they’ll get baptized. And probably at 12 we’ll do a family one since that’s when they start the youth program and the boys will get the Priesthood, so that’s a special one and I think we’ll take them out with just us (Kit and Heidi) to a nice restaurant they pick. I think Kit said even ages we do family and odd years we do friends (and family, of course.) That sounds good.

Another friend said instead of giving their child toys they’re giving them “experience gifts” like a trip to a play, rollerskating, dinner out with just the parents, trip to some special kids’ museum. Could be for the whole family or just with the birthday kid and parents. I like this idea, because I think those memories will last far longer than the toy (judging by how fast toys get broken around here.)

Our grandparents lately have been giving the kids magazine subscriptions (LOVE THAT!!) which is a fun treat all year long for the kids. They have each magazine carefully saved and still go through them all the time. They’ve also done books and the kids treat these books so carefully - honestly, more carefully than most of their books because the gift books with inscriptions seem to really be special to them and whenever we read them they talk about which grandparent gave it to them. They’ve also made homemade gifts, which the kids adore because it’s made JUST FOR THEM and they’re unique… One year Nana made Christopher a teepee tent. It’s amazing, we still use that all the time. And my parents send a card & little treat with a check for the kids’ college funds. Christopher is old enough to appreciate that (and he likes to check his bank balance) and the other kids are just thrilled with the sticker or treat, though I know when they get older they will be so grateful for that savings! (Because we’re not paying for all their college! Sorry, kids, love ya - but not happening.) I’m sure they’ll be thankful for every penny in those accounts.

I got off topic.

OH, birthdays. So we’re trying to come up with ways to make birthdays fun and memorable but not expensive for anyone involved. Like Christmas, we really don’t want this to be about getting stuff. Which is why we instated the 3 present policy for Christmas, which is working really well!! Three toys per kid from us, and little stocking stuffers. We were very happy with how they focused on the other aspects of the holidays and that they didn’t even know about the idea of writing up a wish list until we asked if they wanted to and then it was cute stuff like, “A special date with Dad!” or “double stuff Oreos” (that idea came from a cousin! ) They were excited they got anything, but they didn’t expect anything. And I don’t mean to be scrooge or not let them enjoy the fun of receiving - but I want them to have a perspective about this. That there are billions of kids that don’t get presents at all, ever. They don’t get FOOD or clean water… Our family has been very blessed with having our needs met but I don’t ever want us to start thinking wants are needs… anyway, rambling.

We want to celebrate their birthdays and celebrate them and have the focus be on that - not on the toys. To have fun and be with friends and family and NOT have it involve a lot of money. This is fitting into my whole “simplify” theme for the year, huh?

Ideas? How do you simplify the birthdays, or any holiday celebration, and make them special?

We’re pondering an idea - we’re not finding out gender, we are having an ultrasound (and seriously not watching the screen since our kids tend to be flashers, but we’ll still have them videotape and get pictures for us to see later.) And I’m really excited, but normally I am way too impatient to wait 9 months and I want to know the kid’s gender at conception! We’ve been able to tell with the last pregnancies since the migraine vs. morning sickness thing was so obvious but this time I’m all over the place so we’re not sold either way.

Some friends/family have expressed their interest in finding out the gender so I’m thinking what about this? We do the ultrasound and have the tech write down on a piece of paper the gender, maybe stick in the little “I’m a ______” ultrasound shot just for fun. Then we have her stick it in a sealed envelope and we’ll MAIL IT to someone! They can be our secret keeper (we’ll ask first, of course) and if anyone decides they want to know the gender then they can email this friend and ask! What do you think? I think it could be fun!

Though Secret Keeper would have to be really good at keeping secrets and promise to not tell me even if I threatened torture or offered serious bribes (I may get weak) and anyone that may find out gender has to promise to not use any gender specific pronouns when speaking to us. Kit thinks it’s a funny idea (but he may just be humoring me.)

Do you think you would be a good Secret Keeper? Crazy idea? Am I going to last with not knowing if I know someone on this earth knows??

So, working towards the 2008 Goals I am happy to report I’ve stopped vomiting (knock on wood, it’s been over 2 weeks) and finished my second pint of Ben & Jerry’s (peanut butter cup, working on the cinnamon bun one) AND I’ve gained 3 pounds!! Woo-hoo! Bringing me up to 99lbs, and since I’ll be 12 weeks pregnant on Monday I think we can safely say (barring any surprise viruses in the next couple weeks) that this will be the FIRST trimester I’ve ever had in which I didn’t lose weight!!! Hooray!!! 3 pounds down, another 22 to go. Though if I gain more than 25 pounds I’m throwing myself a party involving ice cream. And pizza.

And, we’ve set a delivery date goal - August 8th. It would be the longest I’ve ever been pregnant (C was 39 weeks 1 day) putting me at 39 weeks 5 days but the real reason is it would be 8/8/2008 and I think that’s fun. C is 11/11/2001. And probably it would make it my biggest baby, if I can get that far… and it’s a Friday. I like Fridays. We said we were going to have Emy on August 27th and she stayed in another 3 days. If this child follows that pattern I would get TO my due date. Can you imagine? How cool would that be??

But I’m still voting for 8/8/2008.

Update I:
Ben & Emy are playing while I type this, she wandered off and he started calling, “Emy? Emy? Emy, where are you??” I’m officially not worried about his speech anymore.

Update II:
Mo’s refusing clothes today so Emy saw her and decided she’s not wearing them. I helped her undress and Bennett saw. He carefully took off his glasses, set them down, then yanked all his own clothes off. As soon as he was naked he held his hands up and yelled, “I WIN!!”

Update III:
Bennett has a little book my mother just sent and he opened it up then walked to Moira and held it out, saying, “Read this!” He’s saying all of these things SO clearly!!! One of his goals for speech is to add tails to his words (final consonant sound, something Mo struggled with.) Just for fun I asked him, “Bennett, can you say caT?” and other words with strong final sounds - he did it. Mo overheard and we suggested she help, so she’s doing speech therapy on Bennett. “Bennett, say poT!” It’s adorable…

Update IV:
My attitude has improved. Kit made apple crisp tonight and Bennett was kind enough to share his ice cream with Emy. Christopher said, “We’ve got to blog about this!” so here you go… Emy’s really loving her older siblings lately.

Ten Old Confessions

And some new ones!

1. Bennett’s current favorite show is “Caterpillar movie” as he calls it (Baby Einstein) and everytime a new toy comes on the screen he whacks me and yells, “Mommy, Mommy, look! A (dog, cat, puppet, giraffe, bear, etc)!” And I am sick of having to validate these same toys OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN and the whacking is getting old. He only remembers my admonish to stop for so long. Isn’t it great he’s speaking so much? Yes, now STOP WHACKING ME!! YES, I SEE!!!

2. Emy’s in a seriously clingy stage. If I am sitting, she needs to be in my lap. And not just in my lap but with her face two inches from my face so I can’t see around her. If I’m standing she’s hanging off my leg whining. If I’m laying down, she wants to lay ON my face. And she’s constantly trying to play with my hair, my glasses, trying to do “nosies” (rub noses, the Eskimo kiss thing?) and the picking and fiddling and clingy is making me INSANE. STOP PULLING MY HAIR, STOP TOUCHING MY GLASSES, STOP TRYING TO TOUCH MY NOSE WHILE SAYING, “NOSE, NOSE, NOSE, MAMMA!” YES, IT’S MY NOSE!!

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