ThadenPierce School

We assembled a bin with a variety of things to make it easier for kids to write friends or family. Stationary sets, paper of all sizes, envelopes of all sizes, stickers, return address labels (though I’m not letting them near the stamps, they still have to come to me for those!) There are also some cards for different occasions and some craft stuff to make cards. If I trusted my children more I would include crayons, markers & pencils as well but we still keep those out of the toddler’s reach.

I didn’t buy anything in particular for this set, I just went around the house collecting items and assembled them in one place. On Sundays we try to write a letter to a friend or family member (near or far, since even local cousins have fun exchanging drawings & letters.) The little kids can doodle or draw, big kids can write, and it encourages me to remember to take the time to include a handwritten note to people we love as well. If I were more creative I would let the kids decorate the box but we’ll have to wait until I have some more energy to tackle that.

I’ve noticed that having the box down and easily accessible has encouraged the kids to grab some paper when the urge strikes and get started. We try to always send thank you notes and this makes it a bit more fun and gives them some control over their medium as well. I’m optimistic this will get all of us into the habit of writing letters more often and in our instant contact world of IM and texting, I think these notes are something special we should preserve. I have boxes of letters from penpals and family over the year and I love to see their handwriting and have that written record of our discussions and our relationship over the year. I hope my children will have that experience, too, so I’m trying to foster their penpal friendships.

Week One:

Week Two:

I made charts for the older three kids, I needed a visual I could give them with daily reminders. I customized it per kid (and made Ben’s simpler with larger font and such) but they generally include:

spelling (includes handwriting)
language (grammar & handwriting & writing)
reading (includes narration & book reports)
math
PE (includes PE, motorlab, swimming, therapy)
piano
special (includes art, music, history, science, ThadenPierce plan)
chores
other (scouts, therapy, etc)

I put an x if they don’t need to do something that day and left it blank if I wanted to write what their “other” was for that week. I left reading blank for them to write in what they are reading, too. There’s a spot for me to write the dates covered and I can hole punch these charts and stick them in their folders for later reference/portfolio stuff. I can also include the lesson number for the language, spelling, math, history chapter and such so we can see what we’ve covered. I’ll have them color in (or put a sticker on) each grid when we get it done so if we don’t get our math lessons done then we know on our built in make up day we need to cover that.

I also left some blank spots at the bottom specifically for habit training – if there’s something I know we need to focus on that week then I can write in Habit: listening! Habit: not interrupting! And if they do a good job focusing on it that day we’ll do a sticker or star or something.

We’ll see how this new system goes, it took maybe 20 minutes to lay everything out and Kit’s printing them up so not a big time investment – but I’m optimistic that this will help the kids be more independent in tasks and help us all stay on track better. If we get into the habit of this now then ideally when Olivia arrives we’ll have an easier time transitioning.

The only difference between week one and two is the chores, I decided to write those in so I knew what to have the kids focus on based on which team they are on – living room or kitchen chores. We still have the chore charts on the fridge detailing team duties but this gives a main focus: bathroom, linens, sunroom, bedrooms, etc. The kids put these in the front of their binders under the plastic cover – perfect! Plus they were excited when I went over the calender and wrote in the various playdates and trips planned.

Instead of memorizing the poems in the First Language Lessons books we’ve been using scripture mastery cards for C and primary songs for M. I decided I needed to be more consistent about it. On Mondays we’ll pick the scripture mastery and song for the week and each of the kids will write some of the scripture/song as part of their handwriting practice for the week. I’ll also write out the words and hang it on the fridge so we all get the reminder to work on memorizing those and to have something we can refer back to for later review.

I think all of us are suffering from memory loss these days because there’s so little we have to memorize – we can always look it up quickly online or on our laptop or in the iPhone, right? But I think memorization is good for our brains and necessary for some things in life so I hope we can make this a relatively fun way to develop this skill.

From Raising Happiness, a great book – summary of some habit formation tips:

- Remove the stimulus (if it’s causing them to be overwhelmed, providing an audience, rewarding inappropriate behavior, etc.) Set them up for success. Example: if they are watching too much TV, unplug it/hide it. If they are not putting dirty clothes in laundry, move the hamper to better location? Brainstorm how to make it easier to reach the goals.

- Make it public in a good way, share goals to increase positive peer & family support of the new habit. Tell grandparents, co-teachers, etc: we’re working on not interrupting and so and so is doing a fantastic job waiting patiently for a turn to speak!

- Pick one goal to work on at a time and make it specific, and stick to it for 3 weeks.

- Anticipate relapses but keep moving forward. Habit formation takes time.

Here’s the chapter titles, and I’ve really enjoyed this book – worth the read. Each chapter has tons of ideas for actually putting these things into practice, how to make them habit and various studies & stories about how this influences kids’ choices.

1. Put on your own oxygen mask first.
2. Build a village.
3. Expect effort & enjoyment – not perfection.
4. Choose gratitude, forgiveness, and optimism.
5. Raise their emotional intelligence.
6. Form happiness habits.
7. Teach self discipline.
8. Enjoy the present.
9. Rig their environment for happiness.
10. Eat dinner together.

At our library’s used book store Moira found these:

One is A Consumer’s Guide for Kids and the other is A Kid’s TV Guide – both part of the Weekly Reader’s Ready-Set-Grow Series. They were published in 1979 and it’s kinda frightening to consider how bad the statistics were about television violence 31 years ago vs. how much worse they must be now.

Christopher read the books quickly and Mo’s enjoying the illustrations but I think we will sit down and actually read them with all the kids – each has a lot of questions to help engage the kids in critical thinking. It was a fun find, I’m glad Moira snagged them – and even better, we paid $.50 for each. I love our library’s book store.

This is going on a card on my fridge to remind me of our summer focus.

Basics:
- handwriting (all)
- speech (Mo & B)
- reviewing parts of speech (C)
- memorizing math facts (+/- for Mo, x for C)
- money math (M & B)
- telling time (M)

Extras:
- piano lessons (Mo & C)
- basic geography: continents, oceans, states, local

Habit Training:
- looking at parent when we speak to them
- not interrupting
- ThadenPierce plan

I really liked this conference talk from Elder David A. Bednar on being mindful of our children’s spiritual needs:

I bear witness that parents who consistently read and talk about the Book of Mormon with their children, who share testimony spontaneously with their children, and who invite children as gospel learners to act and not merely be acted upon will be blessed with eyes that can see afar off (see Moses 6:27) and with ears that can hear the sound of the trumpet (see Ezekiel 33:2–16). The spiritual discernment and inspiration you will receive from the combination of these three holy habits will enable you to stand as watchmen on the tower for your families—“watching . . . with all perseverance” (Ephesians 6:18)—to the blessing of your immediate family and your future posterity

We met a family a bit ago at the Kid Power workshop and then ran into them again at our PE program. They are friends of friends and invited us to participate in a new program they have started called Roots & Shoots. The program is international (and you can read about it here) but our group meets in our town and actually at the park closest to our house. It’s every other week and the kids, with adult assistance, plan and carry out service activities. Today they made paper cards they’ll be decorating to give away and the grown ups learned how to crochet reusable shopping bags to use and/or give away to others.

It seems like a really, really neat group of families and the kids had a blast. Mo knew some of the kids from PE and was ecstatic to see them again and C quickly made friends with two boys his age. At least two of the families live nearby and most seemed to have “alternative” diets like us (vegan, GF, one raw family, etc.) I think we’ll learn a lot and have a fun time.

While I’m excited to meet more homeschooling friends I’m also really happy that the kids will have a community based group of peers to focus on service activities with – we have some of those opportunities at church but not like this.

From the article Kindness 101

But like language acquisition, the inherent capacity to empathize can be profoundly affected by early experience. The first five years of life are now known to be a critical time for emotional as well as linguistic development

It never surprises me to read an article like this – children are born empathetic, infants respond to others’ distress, children need to be given an emotional vocabulary to describe how they feel (just like we teach them labels for colors, we need to teach words for emotions.) It’s all common sense, but I am interested to read when schools attempt to find ways to teach basics such as how to be empathetic. It tells me there’s a heartbreaking problem (obviously more than one problem) in the parenting system when a school has step in to teach what a child already should know but has lost – the ability to empathize.

(I’ve put some books on our library hold list about bullying, everything from toddler board books through stuff for me to read on adolescents. We’re not experiencing this issue but I want to make sure we’re still mindful of it and attuned in case we witness it – as parents or within my calling in church with the kids. There are also some books on “bullyproofing” your kids that may have some good tips for our more reserved and less verbally expressive kids who may need a boost. I’ll post more about those later…)

The article also reminded me that our daily interactions with a baby in the house is beneficial for the kids in a million different ways. I may be stressing about having a newborn and “lessons” (math & spelling, etc) being neglected but for the children, seeing how I react to the fatigue and stressors of postpartum is a crucial lesson in life. Am I patient and empathetic to the new baby, do I explain the different cries and how we can respond/help, do I carefully express my frustrations and how even if I’m exhausted and overwhelmed I must respond with kindness and love? And do I let them know babies are a lot of work but bring joy beyond compare? I hope I do, and I resolve this time around to NOT stress the book lessons but to embrace the much more crucial life lessons that a baby provides us!

First, here’s the very unrevised and not at all current plan we wrote up years ago.

Second, the steps from the lovely book Parenting Breakthrough along with my notes for implementing said plan:

1. Create your personal plan w/much spousal input and kids’ thoughts if appropriate. Keep a separate list for each child to check off and let them see if any of the (age appropriate) tasks strike their fancy.

2. Introduce the new skill far in advance, give them much warning and talk it up.

3. Pick a trainer, it does not have to be you – extended family, friends, older siblings/cousins, church leaders are all resources. Offer to teach a skill to their child in return, “I’ll teach your child how to make bread in exchange for you explain the stock market to my kid!”

4. Hold several training sessions, repeat, repeat, break down into baby steps, make it fun, repeat. Be nonjudgemental, explain this is to help them develop skills for being an adult and don’t get emotional or frustrated or impatient. Just keep trying and assume they’ll need you to train them on this skill for a long, long time. Don’t offer high praise or value judgements on their work, just make observations and offer instruction and let them decide how they did. Correct as needed but in a matter of fact manner.

5. Incorporate into your life, don’t let that skill go to waste. They can teach rarely used skills (how to change a flat tire?) to other youth/siblings. Guideline is if they can do it for themselves then they should. (With exceptions for gestures of service & love like making them breakfast or helping with laundry while they study for exams.)

More to come…